Tuesday, January 6, 2015

MEDIA :: Day 6 :: I NEED Jesus More Than I Know

Truth slap.

When the truth opens your eyes. When you realize something that, once realized, is so important that you literally feel like you've just been slapped across the face.

It often comes when you're least expecting it. 

It is impossible to ignore.

Today I experienced a truth slap. It brought me to tears and all I could say was "Jesus, I desperately need your grace."

I am thankful for a friend who was brave enough, and loving enough, to call me out and say "hey, you've hurt me and I want more from our friendship". 

...and I'm oh so thankful for Jesus who makes forgiveness and repentance possible. 

In His strength I can try again. 

In light of His great mercy I can say I'm sorry, and move forward in a different way. 

I can tend to a broken relationship that is founded on the name of Jesus Christ. Because He died for this. He died to make me whole, and promised not to let me go until His work in my heart and life was complete.

This truth slap would have hit regardless of whether I'm consuming media or not. But rather than drown my self-disappointment in a TV show tonight, I shed some tears, prayed to my gracious Savior, and am currently sitting in the quiet just before bed reflecting here.

Truth slaps hurt. But once you get over the sting, there is work to be done. A lesson that clearly needs to penetrate my heart. And most importantly there is grace, upon grace, upon grace...upon grace.

Thank you Jesus for true friends. For the Truth which really does SET US FREE. For New Years, and new beginnings, and for a quiet evening to let today sink in and begin to change my heart.

I want to be more like you Jesus. Even (and especially) when it hurts my pride. Thank you for forgiving me Lord, especially when I don't deserve it (because I never do), and for sticking with me for the long haul as you continue to change my heart and make my life look more like yours.

...clearly, we've got a long way to go!

And just because...here's my funny (almost) three year old: Harry McBubble-Beard. If I ever doubted God's love for me, I certainly can't doubt it when I look at this sweet blessing. He wears me out, but he brings me joy beyond measure.