Friday, November 27, 2015

T H A N K F U L

Yesterday was Thanksgiving and I'm easing into today with a very thankful heart. Yesterday my parents made us sit around in a circle and share all the things we're thankful for. I have trouble sharing from the heart when I'm put on the spot. I don't know why...but after the first five people shared how thankful they are for family and all the blessings we have, it felt lame to say the same things - even though I am so very thankful for them. I also didn't really feel like crying bunch yesterday, so I held back and said I was thankful for the little things (which I am thankful for). However, if I could go back to that moment yesterday (and have 20 uninterrupted minutes to ramble on about my gushy feelings) here's what I'd say:

.    .    .

I am thankful for my  p a r e n t s  who have given me their all for three decades now. They really did lay down their lives for me, making sacrifices to provide me with a childhood filled with incredible memories and lots of love. They are the most hard working and generous people I've ever met and I'm so thankful to God that he allowed me to be their firstborn. They not only love me completely, but they love my husband, my son, the babies we lost last year, and the sweet little one who will join our family this spring  S O  M U C H! Thank you Mom and Dad for being parents I know I can turn to, for loving through the good and the bad, for showing me what it looks like to give generously to others...I could honestly go on forever. You are truly an incredible blessing in my life, and in the lives of all who know you.
.    .    .

I am thankful for my  s i b l i n g s.  Ashley made me a sister, and though I wasn't always the best sister to her growing up, somehow she still loves me. It hasn't always been easy in our friendship, but as we've grown older I can see the hand of God guiding us along the way. As I watch her in this new stage of life as a married woman I am so thankful that she's in my life and that we get to enjoy this special bond of sisterhood for our whole lives. Griffin has always made us all laugh. He's truly one-of-a-kind, as a kid always going full-force into his interests (whether it was Buzz Lightyear, Elvis, golf, politics, you name it). Now, as he enters manhood, watching his faith flourish brings me so much joy, encouragement, and inspiration. He is so much like my late grandpa! And now on to Stephen, my newest sibling. He is funny and loving and so in love with my sister that I couldn't ask for more. It has been fun getting to know him and his family as he and my sister have joined together as husband and wife this past summer. I am so thankful for my siblings. God has been so gracious in our relationships, and while the childhood memories are so fun to think back on, I am  S O  E X C I T E D  that we get to continue being grown-up siblings for the rest of our lives!

.    .    .

I am thankful for my  i n - l a w s.  Josh's family is so different from my own, yet similar in many ways. I am thankful for Josh's parents who raised the man who is now the head of my household. I am thankful for his siblings (Jeremy, Joey, Mary...and of course my niece and nephew Zoe and Hunter), aunts and uncles, cousins...everyone who has so lovingly welcomed me into their family. There are many laughs with the Matt family, and I'm so thankful for what they bring to my life. It is a blessing to have a second family that is loving and fun to be around. And I am thankful for the times when we are able to combine both sides of the family together to celebrate things. It's always a loud and boisterous time (with lots of laughs) when the Matt's and Lamb's get together! Such a gift!

.    .    .

I am thankful for my  g r a n d p a r e n t s  who have so lovingly poured into my life. My mom's parents have been an especially strong presence in my life for as long as I can remember. I am thankful for all the memories I have shared with them, even more so now that my grandpa has gone home to be with Jesus. I miss him all the time, but am so thankful for the many wonderful memories that keep him here with us in spirit. Seeing my grandma become a great-grandma (Gigi) to my son has been one of my favorite things over these past few years. They both love each other so much and I cherish their relationship. Such a special bond they share! And though my dad's parents have passed away, I am very thankful for the times I got to spend with them as a child. Many special memories to hold onto. Josh has two grandparents who are living as well, and I am so thankful for them. We spend every holiday with them and they are such kind and loving people! In addition to our biological grandparents, our family friend Sandy is truly another grandma to us. She is part of every celebration and such a joy to be around. I can't imagine life without her as part of our family. Our other family friends Alice and Dave have also been like grandparents to me (and my siblings) and the memories and relationships we share with them are so special as well. I could just go on and on!

.    .    .

I am thankful for our  e x t e n d e d  f a m i l y! Between Josh's family and my own, we are EXTREMELY blessed by countless aunts, uncles, cousins, second-cousins, etc. who have we cherish so much! Josh and I are so thankful that many of our aunts, uncles, and cousins live close enough to see fairly regularly. But we also have a lot of family who live farther away. My mom's side of the family is spread over the world, but thankfully many live right here in the U.S. with us. We have family in Montana on both my side and Josh's side of the family who we enjoy visiting when we can. If we could all live on the same street, we'd fill up an entire neighborhood...but man it'd be a blast!!! I don't think many families have such a tight-knit extended family. We are so thankful. We really do wish that we could all live closer though...but we cherish every memory made with our out-of-town family (you know who you are!!!). I think it might take me an hour to type everyone's name out...you are all so special to me, and to my little family! Thank you for loving us from near and afar.

.    .    .

I am thankful for many  f r i e n d s  who have enriched my life in every stage. Childhood friends, college friends, adult friends who I feel like I've known for a lifetime...there are honestly countless friends who have touched my life, some for decades and some just for a season. Regardless of the time period in which each friend has been an active part of my life, I can't imagine who I would be as a wife, mom, daughter, sister, and most importantly a Christ-follower if it weren't for the friends that God has given me throughout my life. If you are or have been a friend to me, in any capacity...know that as I sit here typing this ridiculously long list of thanks (and as I shed a number of tears) I am thinking of you and thanking God for the role you've played in my life. The list would be too long to include every name...but I'm more thankful for you than I really have words to express. Cheesy, yes. True, absolutely!
.    .    .

And of course I am so thankful for my  h u s b a n d  and  c h i l ( r e n ). After all this gushing about how thankful and blessed I am, I honestly just need to dedicate an entire post just to you, the family that we are building together and how crazy blessed I am...I need a break from crying quietly in front of my computer, so I'll press pause for now and type a special blog post just for you! 

Monday, November 2, 2015

Baby #2 | 13 Weeks

Well my plan was to start blogging about my pregnancy starting at 10 weeks (updating every two weeks, like I did when I was pregnant with Harry). So far it hasn't happened. As soon as I hit 10 weeks this pregnancy really started to fly by. The last few weeks have been a blur. It doesn't help that this time of year for me at work is one of the busiest. From the first day of school through conferences is such a busy season and I'm always exhausted. Add in pregnancy and I'm just taking life one very long day at a time.

Anyway, 13 14 (almost 15) weeks, finally sitting down to write this all out:

We found out I was pregnant just a few days before my sister's wedding. It was nearly impossible to keep the secret for the weekend, but we were able to tell my family at brunch the day after the wedding. Everyone was overjoyed, and we were too. But it's definitely bittersweet to find out you're pregnant after two pregnancy losses. We weren't jumping for joy and squealing. It was a tearful, sober kind of joy - but deep down we've had lots of peace throughout the whole pregnancy. Our motto has been to choose to hope vs. living in fear.



Here's our healthy 7 week ultrasound with a strong heartbeat. Praise Jesus!!!


Bump or bloat?! I'm not sure what week this pic was taken but the belly was already starting to grow!


Our next ultrasound was 9 weeks. And baby was healthy and strong again. Growing right on target, and due to join our family April 28th!


Here's my 10 week bump-date :) I started wearing maternity clothes this week because man, they were way more comfortable than normal pants at this point.


Growing like a weed!!!


I told my students at 12 weeks and they WENT NUTS when they figured out the "hangman" puzzle I made for them. It was pretty adorable. They were so sweet: "We wondered why your stomach was getting bigger, but we didn't want to say anything." :)


12 weeks and I had a little buddy in my picture!!!


And here I am at 14 weeks. Definitely popping out and everyone I talk to asks when I'm due. 


Got to celebrate my friend Megan's soon-to-be baby girl (coming in December) at her baby shower this weekend. You wouldn't think there's about 20 weeks between us...which makes me a little nervous about just how large this belly will be getting.

Overall, I'm feeling peaceful and thankful. I know that this life is precious, made by God, and completely out of my control. With that in mind I've been able to enjoy each moment knowing that it's a gift to carry this life, no matter how long he/she lives inside (and hopefully outside) the womb.

Thanks for journeying with me through my miscarriages and this pregnancy as well. It's all given me a stronger faith and more dependence on the Lord, which makes me thankful - even for the darkest days. But so far (aside from first trimester fatigue and feeling carsick most of the time) I have had a smooth ride this time around! Praying for this little one to safely make it into our arms and home so that we can finally become a family of four!