So Unworthy, SO THANKFUL!

This morning I am in awe. Jesus came in complete humility to be with us. He came as a baby to live and die and rise again so that we might have life and have it to the fullest. The Creator of the universe loves us that much.

It honestly blows my mind when I consider it.

That is what Christmas is all about. And the magic of it all - the lights, carols, treats, family traditions, gifts - is just a glimpse of The TRUE Gift of Christmas, Jesus Christ!

I woke up this morning, and it's truly a Christmas miracle - Harry is still asleep. So I'm sitting by the fire, with the tree and candles lit, and gifts waiting for our sweet boy to discover. We were thoroughly spoiled yesterday by Josh's family...and I am sure that we will be equally spoiled later today when we head to my parent's house. Our families do Christmas BIG, and I have struggled this Christmas season feeling the weight of how unworthy I am of such generosity. I struggle to do things "right". My house is a mess most all of the time. My Christmas cards are still sitting on my desk waiting to be sent out. At work I feel like there's always more I could be doing to be the teacher I long to be. I struggle because to me, doing things right looks like absolute perfection...and I constantly fall short.

As I walked down the stairs this morning I had a quiet thought; I know it wasn't from me, because these are not the kinds of things I think up on my own.

The Holy Spirit whispered in the quiet of my heart that my imperfection, my failing, my lack of feeling "worthy", and my longing for perfection is exactly why Jesus came.

Christmas is extravagant because the grace of Jesus is nothing short of extravagant. I don't deserve a picturesque Christmas morning in my home with my sweet family. I don't deserve the generosity of my family. I don't deserve grace...

...even if my house were perfectly clean all of the time.

...even if I was the perfect friend, the perfect wife, mother, daughter, sister, teacher (fill in the blank)

I would still need Jesus. Because even my best attempt at perfection would not be enough to save me.

I have a long way to go. My heart is often times a mess, but God is not done working on me. And I know He isn't done working on your heart either. He is truly in the business of redeeming lives and changing hearts to be more full and complete and aligned with the heart of the Father.

Oh sweet Jesus THANK YOU FOR COMING. Thank you for giving up your throne in heaven to experience life on this earth as a man. You lived the life I cannot live. You died the death that my sin deserves. You rose and conquered sin and death...and now you live on the throne again. I long for the day when you return or call me home to be with you Jesus. In the meantime I am overwhelmed by your extravagant grace in my life. Nothing evidences that like Christmas does. Please help me to have a heart of gratitude that realizes and appreciates the gift of Christmas each and every day. Christmas days come and go, tomorrow will be here before I know it. And yet, you are with me always and will never leave or forsake me Lord. Thank you for loving me - a broken messy woman who tries to earn your grace. Please help me to realize more and more in this coming year that you long for me to just surrender my life to you...and that all of my striving will not make you love me any more or less.

I am SO UNWORTHY Lord - but I am SO VERY THANKFUL!

She Shares Truth: Commissioned Moments

What holds you back from being available for commissioned moments? When have you experienced a commissioned moment and how did you witness God’s supernatural power at work? Pray and ask God to present a commissioned moment. Then let’s gather to share our stories and encourage one another.

"When they say Him, they worshipped Him; but some doubted. Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the end of the age."

|  Matthew 28:17-20  |

This. Is. CONVICTING to me.

I am right there in the midst of worship and doubt, as much as I hate to admit it. And unfortunately my doubt gets in the way of me being fully open and ready for the kind of "commissioned moments" that Jesus commands us to live in. 

And still...Jesus comes. 

This amazes me. He sees my worship, tainted with doubt, and still chooses to come and speak into my life. Sure, He commands a lot from me - to go and make disciples - but He promises to BE WITH ME ALWAYS. I had to read this passage a few times for this promise to begin to sink in.

I have a loving and supportive family, and several close friends that I know I can count on. And while I'd like to think they'll always be there for me...they are human and imperfect, just like I am. We let each other down because we are selfish. It's just the reality of human relationships.

But with Jesus it is different. His promise is true and He never changes so I know for certain that I am not alone. The part that is hard to fully accept is the fact that He is with me in my doubt. He doesn't require me to have it all together before He calls me to follow Him and share the Gospel with others. 

So while I'd like to share amazing stories of how I've been faithful to share Christ with strangers when I've felt God putting it on my heart, I honestly think this is an area that I need to humbly repent in. I've not been faithful to worship Jesus in this way. I've held back for fear of what people might think or say. I'm all for encouraging fellow believers in their faith, and while that brings God glory and helps others along in their relationship with Him...I am convicted that God wants me to step out in faith and be ready at any moment to boldly proclaim the Gospel to whoever He might want me to share it with.

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How about you? 

Where are you at in this area of your faith? 

Have you been on the receiving end of a "commissioned moment"? Or do you have an example of how God used you to share the Gospel with someone else?

I'd love to hear in the comments!

...and if you're like me, let's not be ashamed, or condemn ourselves. Instead, let me know and we can pray for one another in this area!

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus" 

Romans 8:1

THANKFUL for the Empty Tomb!

There is so much to say about Easter. This year was very special. I got to worship my RISEN Savior at church with not only my husband and son, but my parents and sister!

And then we had a wonderful sunny day filled with food, laughter, and childlike delight as we watched Harry experience the first egg hunt that he has actually been into.

I have pictures and reflections that I need to upload and write out...

...but for today I am so thankful that She Reads Truth is not "over" Easter. Celebrating the Resurrection is the most important day of the year for the Christian. But living in light of Christ as our Risen Lord is a daily...lifelong endeavor.

If you are wanting to know more about Jesus and/or are needing a way to focus your time reading the Bible, hop on over to She Reads Truth and start reading their new study "The Risen Christ".

It is SO GOOD. Today's reading literally gave me chills and made me tear up. Jesus is SO GOOD! And the fact that He is alive and at work in our lives is such amazing news. The BEST NEWS in fact!

Click here to go straight to Day 1 of The Risen Christ reading plan.  And just to make it easy, here's the link to Day 2's reading.

A quote from the first post in this series: 

"The Empty Tomb is not the end. It is the start of EVERY NEW BEGINNING." 

  

#shereadstruth

She Shares Truth :: 1 Corinthians 2:1-5

Have you ever journaled using the SOAP method? I learned about it quite a few years ago through a friend, and was just reminded once again of how powerful it can be to journal in this way.

SOAP stands for:

Scripture

Observation

Application

Prayer

I'm going to just journal out my response to 1 Corinthians 2:1-5 using SOAP here in my blog today.

| S | 

1 Corinthians 2:1-5 (NLT)

When I first came to you, dear brothers and sisters, I didn’t use lofty words and impressive wisdom to tell you God’s secret plan. For I decided that while I was with you I would forget everything except Jesus Christ, the one who was crucified. I came to you in weakness—timid and trembling.  And my message and my preaching were very plain. Rather than using clever and persuasive speeches, I relied only on the power of the Holy Spirit.  I did this so you would trust not in human wisdom but in the power of God.  

| O |

Paul relied on the Holy Spirit to give him the words that preached. He was humble and recognized his weakness and need for God to speak through him. Paul was focused on one thing: Jesus and his work on the cross. That's in. He didn't need impressive words, or wisdom from others. All he needed to do was keep his eyes, mind, and heart on Christ. When Jesus was on the throne, nothing else mattered...because the only thing that truly matters in this life is the work of Jesus on the cross. Everything else is secondary.

| A |

Paul had one focus: Jesus.

I love Jesus, but I have a lot of other focuses. 

My marriage, parenting, work, family, friendships, things that I enjoy doing (like reading, photography, crafting, sewing...etc). None of which are "bad" things. In fact I think they are all very good things, but clearly not the better.

Paul knew and lived out the truth that Jesus is truly the better in comparison to all things. It all boils down to Jesus being our only need.

 I hate to admit it, but often times my own selfish "needs" take up too much of my thoughts and time. I do focus on Jesus; His church and the relationships I have with other believers are a very important part of my life. But how often can I honestly say that I have decided to "forget everything except Jesus Christ, the one who was crucified"?  Not enough. Not even close to enough.

This week has been my spring break. Aside from the normal spring break things that I always set out to enjoy (extra sleep, fresh air, books, the park, and family time), I also set aside some time to be alone, with my Bible, journal and most importantly Jesus. It was clearly just the beginning of a work that I am sure will take quite some time, but I felt like the Lord was calling me to focus on Him. To literally forget everything else and just go straight to Him - with my fears, my hopes, my joys, my whole heart.

The only way that I am ever going to really live out my belief that Jesus is enough (more than enough actually) and my only need is to be more like Paul and forget everything except for Jesus.

I am so thankful for God's TRUE WORD that has reminded me of this throughout the past week.

Will you join me in continuing to pursue this kind of mind/heart shift?

| P |

Lord Jesus. You. Are. EVERYTHING! All else in this life is nothing in comparison to your glory and the work that you have done and continue to do in my life and in the lives of all believers. Please help me to live this out. Please train my eyes to focus on You alone Lord, and convict me when I stray and wander. Your grace astounds me Lord and I pray that you would reveal it to me more and more as I continue along this journey of discipleship. Fill me up to overflowing so that Your grace will spill out of my life and into the lives of all those around me; not my "impressive" words or actions, but rather the Holy Spirit living and working through me.

Amen.

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