...Up Next

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Month One:  M E D I A

Month Two:  P O S S E S S I O N S

Month Three:  F O O D

Month Four:  W A S T E

Month Five:  C L O T H E S

Month Six:  S P E N D I N G

Month Seven:  S T R E S S

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M O N T H    T W O   -   P O S E S S E S S I O N S

Josh and I are taking a vacation in EIGHT days.

Whew.

We seriously cannot wait.

This is our first vacation without Harry. We've left him overnight a couple of times, but never for a full-blown vacation. I know we'll miss him like crazy...but we really need this. After losing the baby this fall it's been a tough go. While I'm doing so much better mentally and emotionally, the loss really took a toll and life just hasn't slowed down. With work, the holidays, and Josh moving into a new detective position, we've found that our time together is limited and usually reserved for our most tired moments. Quality time just the two of us is practically a miracle.

So I figured it'd be best to start "month two" when we return. I should also probably reread this section of  Jen Hatmaker's book "7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess" before I launch in.

Maybe that'll be some of my vacation reading.

I'm actually JAZZED to be getting rid of possessions!

I've got a pile of clothing that I've already prepared to give away, but I anticipate that this will only be the tip of the iceberg. Coming out of a season of lots of giving/receiving, I'm excited to scour our belongings and find meaningful ways to give our stuff to people who need it much more than we do.

I just read this convicting portion of Mark today at church. When a rich man came to Jesus and asked what he must do to inherit eternal life, this was Jesus' response:

"And Jesus, looking at him, loved him and said to him, 'You lack one thing: go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come follow me.' Disheartened by the saying, he [the man] went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions."  Mark 10:21-22 ESV

Oh, how I want to respond differently than this man. What a shame that he walked away. How sad that he turned from Jesus and chose his possessions over the only One who can bring us freedom, peace, and salvation.

I want to choose Jesus over my possessions. And I think that God has a lot to teach me in this area.

So when we return from vacation, I'll be back here to blog about this next area of fasting.

 Lord please humble me and show me how You long for me to change in this area of my life!

MEDIA :: Reflections

Well it's clearly February. I thought it might be a good idea to sit down and reflect a little on my blog about how the Media Fast went and what I learned.

Surprisingly, a month without media went pretty quickly. I missed TV the most at first, but now that I made it through the first month I hardly think about watching it. The only show I've watched in the past week was Parenthood. I missed the last four episodes of the series (as they aired during my fast) and since I've followed the whole series and loved all of the characters, I enjoyed seeing how they wrapped up the show. There were many tears as I said goodbye the the Braverman family; I'm not ashamed to admit it. I may go back and watch the final episode one more time. It was just so good!

Aside from Parenthood though, I have had no desire to watch TV. Netflix has remained untouched, and I still find myself listening to music or reading books which is a quieter and more fulfilling change.

On the other hand, I have been happily indulging in Instagram. It was the first thing I did on February 1st was redownload Instagram. And I don't regret getting back on. I did "unfollow" quite a few accounts that I used to follow. Not because they're not inspiring people (many Christian authors, and women who run businesses and/or fabulous blogs), but I find that with too many accounts to keep up with I was checking Instagram too frequently, or breezing through trying to "catch up" but rarely able to take the time to actually look at the photos in my feed.

With less photos to peruse, and less of a "pull" to my phone now that I broke my habit of constantly checking it...it feels good to be back on. I like seeing a few inspiring photos, and little peeks into the daily lives of my friends and family.

I took a month off. It was nice to have a breather, and now I can come back with a fresh perspective and a mind that's not compulsively opening the app whenever I grab my phone.

Overall, the fast slowed me down. It reminded me that I don't have to be "plugged in" to my technology all the time in order for my life to be meaningful. God spoke to me in various ways, and reminded me of the importance of relationship maintenance. The kind that takes intentionality and face-to-face quality time. Some positive changes have resulted and I'm looking forward to becoming a better friend in 2015.

I feel the beginning of a change that God has been working on in my heart. It's starting to take shape and so far it looks like a more "present" version of myself.

As I keep journeying through this year, I'm excited to see what God continues to do. He's nudging me to change. And He's equipping me to...with a tender and gentle grace that says "I am with you" and "I will never leave you" in the process.

Now I better go check back on my first blog to see what I had planned to fast from next. I wrote it in a blog post, but should probably write it out on paper ;) lol!

Date Knight

Our church hosted a date night for moms and sons. The theme was Knights and it was quite possibly the cutest thing ever. We had a table set for two. Dinner by candle light. Professional photos. A little dancing. And of course dessert. When I asked Harry what he liked best. He said, "...maybe the chocolate!" My sweet little knight was (mostly) a gentleman, and if he hadn't already stolen my heart...he most certainly did tonight!

He tried to blow the candle out, all evening!

Dessert tastes better when you wear a little of it on your face. Clearly! 

Dancing with his favorite big boy Tony!

Harry's blurry shot of the table after dinner.

Last but not least: a picture of me, photo credit goes to Harry. 

Letter: 3 Years

Dear Harrison,

Three years ago today, you were born. I am in AWE of how you made our family so full. Full of laughter, joy, tears, hugs, noise, smooches, and lots and lots of messes. Seriously, you are the boss of making a mess. All we have to do is give you about 10 minutes and the house looks like a disaster zone. Even though it makes me crazy sometimes...I really LOVE the mess. I love that life is no longer quiet and tidy with you around.

Now that you're three (and potty-trained :) WAHOO!) I finally feel like I have a big boy. My baby is slipping away, and while the thought of it used to make me cry, I am so glad you are three. You are loving and tender-hearted. You can be bossy and sometimes rude...but mostly you just love to make people laugh and discover "silly" things that make you laugh.

Oh, that belly laugh. I wish I could bottle it up to save forever.

You still love trains, planes, cars...pretty much anything that zooms. You also love animals. Lately you like to be "Harry tiger" which automatically makes me "Mommy tiger". We play this game with animals, super-heros...you name it!

The other day on the way home from school you were telling me about which letters are "for" your friends. "H is for Harry. M is for Myla..." I am amazed by the things you are learning on a daily basis.

Last night when I told you "three more bites" of dinner, without skipping a beat you responded with "Dad told me two bites". I looked over at your Daddy who shook his head laughing. He had said no such thing! How do you already come up with stuff like that?! We couldn't help but laugh...but don't get any ideas...your Dad and I are on the same team. I'm sure this is just the first of many attempts to try to get what you want. You really are a kid now!

Happy 3rd birthday sweet Harry boy!

I hope today is wonderful day for you.

Most importantly, today and always, I hope that you know how deeply you are loved. Not just by your family but by Jesus. He knows you better than anyone ever will, and He delights in you my big boy. My greatest hope and prayer for your life is that you grow to know Jesus too. That with every passing year you will grow in a deeper understanding of who Jesus is, and what He has done for you. He has truly changed my life, and continues to do so daily.

It's the greatest adventure you will ever go on, walking with Jesus. I can tell already that you have such an adventurous heart. Your favorite stories involve wild animals like in the Jungle Book, the adventures of your favorite characters from Toy Story, anything with swords, and lately the story of David and Goliath (which you pronounce "Gwi-wif"). Trust me...living for Jesus will be full of grand adventures. I cannot wait to see how and where He leads you in your life.

I'm about to go wake you up (I just can't wait to hug and kiss you). It's time to eat a birthday doughnut for breakfast!!! And tonight after Daddy and I pick you up from school it'll be a special birthday dinner with the three of us. We can't wait to hang out with you and treat you to ice cream for dessert!

...and even though we had your party, I think there's a special present waiting for you to open tonight.

Thanks for being our boy. You are such a blessing in our lives. Seriously...the BEST gift we have ever received came to us the moment you were born.

Love always,

Mama

MEDIA :: Day 27

This post keeps getting renamed.

It was supposed to be posted on Day 25...then Day 26. Here I am two days after starting it and I'm still struggling to put my thoughts into words worth sharing, but here goes:

Even though media isn't consuming my time...it's still easy to waste time. So while I'd love to say every moment has become more meaningful without media vying for my attention...it's not entirely true.

However, I do think that after almost a month of not turning on Netflix, I've dropped the habit of automatically watching an episode of my latest TV show binge when I'm doing chores around the house. And when I go to my phone, there really isn't much to do besides take a photo of Harry or check the weather.

The change in my heart has been subtle. Less noise, more quiet time to think. Less visual distraction, more time to pay attention to things that need attending to around the house, and most importantly the people who need attending to. I've been able to catch little moments of Harry playing in the background while I'm doing dishes that I may have missed before because I was more distracted.

I don't know if it's because I'm not as plugged into technology or because he's entering a new stage, but Harry has been asking us to play more with him. I'm not naturally good at playing boy things...but I've been enjoying a little more time flying planes around the family room, driving trains across elaborate tracks, and pretending to be every kind of animal Harry can imagine.

I guess the other thing that I've realized that feels kind of good - I don't have to document every sweet moment of motherhood online for it to have happened. I still take pictures, and in all honesty I am really looking forward to getting back onto Instagram. But I'm okay with the fact that this month we were able to step back and just be. It hasn't been a perfect month. My life is not magazine-worthy...and I'm totally okay with that. And just because there is nothing on my Instagram feed to show for it, doesn't mean that this month wasn't full, or that these memories somehow don't matter as much.

The one thing I'm certain of:

I'm still a mess of a person. I try my hardest, most of the time, and even so I fail time and again. I let people down. I have so much room for growth. My natural tendency is to be selfish. I need Jesus.

Thankfully He isn't finished with me yet.

I'm really hoping that this year He purges my heart in a major way. Getting rid of the old and making room for the new that I didn't even realize I so desperately needed. I feel like He is already stirring my heart up in ways that I've never experienced before. Yet I don't really know what it all means. I just know that He is faithful to keep working on me.

Eager Waiting

I can't stop reading this verse. 

Jesus, what should "eager waiting" look like in my life?

Ahoy Matey

We had a "swashbuckling" time at Harry's 3rd Birthday: PIRATE PARTY!

Lots of family and some of Harry's friends (plus their families). Add in a pirate book, a treasure hunt, lots of sugar...and we had one very happy pirate boy (and a really tired Mama)!

My mom's cousin Catherine pulled off the most INCREDIBLE pirate cookies of all time. Seriously...they made the party! (Thanks Catherine)!!!

Three candles for our (almost) THREE year old Harry!

The treasure. 

Honestly...it was BREATHTAKING!

Story time. Harry insisted on sitting on my lap, and since it was his party...I figured, why not?! :)

The Treasure Hunt...hilarious!

PIZZA :) Harry's favorite!

The Piñata. I can't tell who was more into it, the kids or the parents ;) lol!

And then...the photo booth. My family got WAY MORE into it than the kids. These pictures will be sure to make an appearance from time to time...just for a good laugh!

All in all...it went down without a hitch. I think that's the right phrase.

Happy Third Birthday Harrison Levi Matt!